Saturday, May 13, 2006


Business Man's Special

When I woke up Thursday night, Danny’s lovely wife was upset and I could hear their phone conversation that Danny was in a hornets nest. My head hurt with bruises and my hips were bruised as well. Also, my elbows were red with raspberries. Upon further inspection my wallet was missing and my new cell phone was missing. Earlier prior to me waking up, Danny did not make a good impression on my son as just before he finished introducing himself, reverse peristalsis kicked in and he hurled into the kitchen sink.

Sometimes you just want to get high! This was a day I decided to let go. I had tickets to the Padres-Brewers businessman special day game. For the time being I’m waiting for my bud Danny who was driving to my crib from Jamul about an hour away. Jesus had just mowed my lawn and upon inspection, I noticed he missed the mushrooms. However, the lawn, “man it still looks good.” I am really digging this new super bowl sod I’ve recently had installed. The sun was breaking through the mid morning haze and it felt right to bust open a bottle of the local micro brew known as Red Trolley. I put on Primo Aventuras a local Salsa Band and practiced my Salsa out in the front yard for my Asian neighbors to see. I told Danny when he arrived to be prepared because we were getting hammered.

The game was great! Padres won 8-4 and the Padres Pitcher Jake Peavey had 13 strikeouts. Between the two of us we matched or exceeded Peavey’s strike out ratio with spirits. Later at a garden bar on 6th and K we continued our sophomoric onslaught and got into a discussion with a couple of pretentious dudes on golf which escalated to an argument on who was better our guy Charlie or their guy Hank. Basically it was about whose “Dick” was bigger, better, faster! As we postured-one of them gave me phone and the person on the line asked who the fuck is Charlie Morton?” and I said, “who the fuck is Hank Wilson?” With that we wagered large amounts of dollars and dates for them to play before we were asked to leave by the bouncer dudes. I remember Danny a calling cab to drive us to where my car was parked! Though I don’t remember, I’m sure we tumbled several times before we felt this was best thing to do.

Typically when I have acted out, it was for escape or to medicate or to act out aggression. Maybe this experience was all of these. Or maybe I was in the tailwind of Danny’s marital stuff. Who knows? How do I feel about it now? Yes it was childish, yes it was dangerous, and yes it was living out there without thought to the consequences. No I don’t want to do it again at least not without preparing for the consequences, and finally, yes I did thoroughly enjoy it!!!

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